Relationship Advice, Sex Tips and Techniques, Sexual Health

Proof that Spooning Improves Relationships

snuggling couple



Never underestimate the power of touch! Cuddling, massages, hand-holding…we girls just can’t seem to get enough!  Guys too, although they may not be as quick to admit it.  But does loving physical contact after sex actually improve a relationship?  And can you actually prove this correlation?  Science says YES, and I say HOORAY, SCIENCE!

Some recent research at the University of Toronto Mississauga shows that a little post-nooky spooning can help improve your relationship.  The study, published in the Archives of Sexual Behavior, shows that “kissing, caressing, and loving talk” after intercourse are all associated with greater sexual and relationship satisfaction.

Kat Van Kirk, Ph.D., a licensed marriage and sex therapist, says that the chemical oxytocin is likely the main driver behind this phenomenon.  Oxytocin is often referred to as the “love hormone”; it’s released as a result of pleasurable physical contact and has been shown to increase bonding. Staying physically close after sex can also act as a form of nonverbal communication. “It can help you relax, inhibit any sensations of pain—emotional or physical—and help reinforce to your partner that you are invested and committed to them,” says Van Kirk.

Other benefits include the simple fact that closeness can lead to more sex. “Cuddling can help keep you aroused for another roll in the hay,” says Van Kirk.

The study had some interesting results regarding who benefits the most from post-sex cuddling.  Couples with children has the biggest results, likely because of limited time for cuddling with each other during the day.  Women, in general, exhibited a larger benefit than me in the study, though men did report a noticeable improvement in their relationships and sex lives, too.

So you’re probably wondering.  What it the perfect amount of time to snuggle with your partner?   Aim for more than 15 minutes—that’s what the people in the study who said they were happiest with their relationships did.  Personally, I think that 15 minutes is simply not long enough, but hey, science, amiright?

Pure Romance Valentine's Day
Bath and Beauty, Lubricants and Creams, Massage, Relationship Advice

Valentine’s Day Gift Ideas

Are you hard pressed to find the right Valentine’s Day gift for your special someone at the last minute? Or maybe you are looking for something a little more special than the typical flowers, chocolates and stuffed animals?  While all of these gifts can be great and will warm the heart for a day, a gift from Pure Romance can last a lifetime and will heat things up in a completely different way!

If you are in or around Lexington, Kentucky- I have a huge inventory in-stock and ready if you want need a last minute pick-up.  Contact me to place your order!  Here are a few of my personal favorites and some suggestions from Pure Romance’s founder- Patty Brisben:

Pure Romance Heart MassagerHeart Massager: This product is perfect for those chilly nights. It’s also Pure Romance’s best-selling product in the month of February. Use it to soothe your partner’s body, then bring it close to yours with this simple-to-use heated massage pack. At 129° F, the only thing hotter is your desire!  These are also easy to re-charge and re-use.  I keep a couple of these around the house for quick and easy access!


Pure Romance Burning DesireBurning Desire Soy Massage Oil Candle: This one definitely has a more seductive Valentine’s Day theme… Leave your partner a dirty message to set the tone of the night. Don’t forget to pair our Heart Massager with this sensual and decadent treat!  Burn this soy massage oil candle and let the sweet, fragrant oil take over your body. Melted massage oil is great for doubling as a warm, rich body balm. Lasts up to 20 massages.


Pure Romance Pure Naked LubricantPure Naked Massage Oil:  If you know me at all, you know that I am all about health, wellness, and clean living.  I love products with clean, natural ingredients.  Go Naked with a massage oil that’s 100% natural. Hydrate your skin with nourishing oils and vitamins, all while enjoying a sensual massage.



Pure Romance Date Night 2Date Night 2: It’s the gift that keeps on giving. Not only is this a great foreplay item, it can also help you reconnect with your partner and learn something new! Date Night 2 is a three deck adult card game that will help you up the ante in the bedroom! With a variety of ways to play and three decks of sexy suggestions, Date Night 2 sets the table so you can go all in!


Gift-BoxThe Executive Luxury Dual-Motor Vibrator: This bedroom toy is worth every penny. Whether you are coupled or uncoupled, everyone deserves an Executive this Valentine’s Day!  This silicone dual-action toy is equipped with two motors to deliver firm vibrations. The ultimate multi-tasker, the Executive flutters against the clitoris as its contoured head gratifies the G-spot.


Pure Romance Masterpiece FloggerMasterpiece Flogger: Feeling adventurous? Test out our Masterpiece Flogger. It’s a constant reminder to keep creativity in the bedroom and be open to new experiences.  When it’s time for discipline that’s on the softer side, the Masterpiece Flogger offers a firm handle and plush, velvety tails that tease and please with every scintillating strike. Perfect for beginners looking for a little bit of pain with their pleasure!

The countdown is on!  Valentine’s Day is upon us!  If you need a Pure Romance gift at the last minute and are around the Lexington, Kentucky area, I have a huge inventory of goodies that are available for pickup.  Contact me!

Relationship Advice

8 Simple Rules for a Happy Marriage

Marriage advice has been around since, well, marriage. While cultural values have changed and modern life presents new marital challenges, the principles of a loving marriage are timeless. Here are eight simple rules for a happy marriage.

  1. Keep an open line of honest communication. This is it; the single most important rule for a happy marriage is also the oldest rule in the book: Be honest. If you want to maintain trust in your marriage, you must commit to communication. It’s as simple as that. Say what’s on your mind. When you are asked a question, answer it honestly.

You’ve probably heard from your parents, or from Judge Judy, that one lie leads to another. The need to protect your lie and keep your story straight creates a snowball of deception that inevitably becomes an avalanche. Honesty works the same way. Telling the truth, even a difficult one, makes telling the next truth easier. When spouses expect the truth (and get it), marriages are much happier.

Note: Being open and honest is not a license for meanness or abuse. You chose to spend your life with this person. Be nice. Instead of starting sentences with “I hate it when…” try “I would like it if…” or “I need you to…”

  1. Be faithful. The completely accidental, it-just-kinda-happened fling is a myth, a work of absolute fiction. Even a drunken one-nighter with a stranger requires several decisions on your part. Cheating doesn’t happen to people—people decide to cheat.

Following this rule comes down to keeping yourself out of tempting situations. Don’t go out for drinks with your secret crush in the next cubicle. If you are unsure whether you are putting your marriage at risk, ask yourself how you would feel if your spouse were in your place. If that thought makes you uncomfortable, then you are in a bad spot. Get out of it.

  1. Be supportive.  From the moment you say “I do,” you and your spouse are in this thing together, and as Lincoln said, “A house divided against itself cannot stand.”

This is not to say that you have to agree with every decision your spouse makes. Thinking your marriage will escape any disagreement is naiveté. If your spouse makes a decision you don’t like, voice your opinion (Rule 1!) but once the decision is made, stand by each other. In some cases, no one else will.

  1. Put the couple first.  Every paycheck, you put some money into your 401K. Sometimes, it would be nice to have that cash back to spend on new clothes or a night out, but you know that the little bit of money you put away today will grow into more money tomorrow. Apply the same logic to the time you give to your spouse.

You’ve got to show up, to put in your time. That might mean doing something fun like planning a date night. That also might mean attending a company picnic and listening to the boss’ sailing story again. Whatever it is, be there with a smile on your face. The blip of time you spend now will pay off in a happy, supportive marriage.

  1. Stay, even when it’s difficult.  Dramatic exits are great reality TV fodder, but they can wreck your marriage. Not only is stomping away childish, but it shows your spouse that you do not want to work on the marriage, that you give up. Is that really the message you want to send? Once you walk out in anger, you can never return to the same relationship.
  1. Brag on each other.  You wouldn’t have walked down the aisle if your spouse never wowed you. Don’t let the phenomenal become familiar; don’t let the magic become commonplace. When your spouse does something remarkable, remark on it. Never let your spouse forget why you fell for them.
  1. Have fun together.  Keep your marriage from feeling like work by having fun with your partner. Never stop doing the things you’ve always loved doing together; try to recreate some of your old dates if you want. But don’t just rely on the past; life is happening now. Keep finding new ways to share a laugh. Stepping outside your normal routine will keep you close and happy.

8. Don’t forget you are your own person.  One of the things that attracted your spouse to you is that you had your own interests. Don’t give up your passions just because your spouse isn’t into them. These hobbies will give you more to talk about and help keep you personally fulfilled.

Also, don’t forget about your friends. You can hang out with them without your spouse. Sometimes, a group of women just needs to be a group of women and a group of men just needs to be a group of men. Don’t worry; your spouse won’t leave you for taking a little me time.

Remember to keep your eyes on the big picture. See the forest, not the trees. If both of you can stick to these rules, everything else will fall into place.

Relationship Advice, Sex Tips and Techniques, Sexual Health

Sexy Foods and Surprising Aphrodisiacs

Did you know bananas are considered an aphrodisiac? Maybe that’s why the Chiquita lady is always smiling!  Bringing sexy back might not be as difficult as you think. Plenty of foods contain aphrodisiac powers, and we aren’t talking about rare spices you can only find by hiking through a forgotten rain forest in South America. Some very common foods can help you get in the mood.


The Romans believed the avocado’s egg shape made it a natural fertility aid. (With reasoning like that, we’re surprised the empire lasted as long as it did.) But modern science now tells us there’s something to the theory: Avocados are packed with Vitamin E, which helps produce sex hormones including testosterone and estrogen. That means these little green beauties can help boost arousal and intensify orgasms.

Chile Peppers

Turns out, eating hot can get you hot. Chile peppers contain a compound called capsaicin, which gets your blood pumping, well, everywhere. A pepper’s heat increases your heart rate, and your brain responds by upping your endorphins to fight the burn. Your body does a few calculations; adds up the blood flow, endorphins, and increased heart rate; and thinks it is aroused. How’s that for an excuse to make tacos?


Consider the shape of a banana, and there’s no doubt why they are one of the world’s sexiest foods. Suggestive shape aside, bananas are a great source of potassium and Vitamin B, which are essential to sex hormone production. Maybe that’s why the Chiquita lady is always smiling.


Like the avocado, the egg is an ancient fertility symbol with real-life aphrodisiac properties. Eggs contain L-arginine, an amino acid that ups your nitric oxide to dilate your blood vessels, the same as many sexual dysfunction drugs. Plus they contain Vitamins B5 and B6, natural mood enhancers. Breakfast in bed just took on a whole new meaning.


You say “tomato,” I say “Are you trying to have sex with me?” Tomatoes, aka “The Love Apple,” contain potassium that enhances muscle control and vitamins that relax your nerves, helping prepare you for intimacy. Who knew marinara could be a turn-on?
Foreplay never tasted so good. Add a few of these aphrodisiac gems to your grocery list, and you’ll be satisfied after every meal.
valentine's gift ideas for men
Relationship Advice

7 At-Home Date Night Ideas


The perfect date doesn’t have to break the bank.  Whether it’s a cozy night in with our Date Night 2 Game or YouTube karaoke, we’ve got everything you need for a memorable date night!

The next time you’re looking for an exciting place to go on a date night, try the living room. Check out these seven creative ideas for a date night at home.

1. Cook something up.

Plan a meal from beginning to end. Pick the recipe, shop for ingredients, and cook together. You’ll work together, the kitchen will put you in close quarters, and at the end of the date, you’ll share a delicious meal.

2. Sing your hearts out.

Unleash your inner rock star! Find lyric videos on YouTube and have a karaoke party for two. Step out of your comfort zone by picking each other’s songs. Not up for belting out a song, even in private? Turn on some dance music and get down!

3. Play games.

Bust out some board games, create some flirty competition, and feel like a kid again. Play an adult card game to add some sizzle to your date.

4. Camp out.

Leave your phones in the house and spend the night outdoors. Walk around your neighborhood holding hands and stargazing. Build a fire in the backyard and roast marshmallows as you sit close. Then spend the night snuggling in a tent.

5. Spend a night abroad at home.

Have an international theme night! Make food native to a country you’ve never visited, listen to music by artists from that country, and watch a movie that’s set there. For example, make spaghetti and meatballs, listen to Pavarotti, and watch “Roman Holiday.” Try learning a few sexy words in your chosen country’s language—and using them. It’s a nice spin on the dinner-and-a-movie standby.

6. Exercise.

Have a date that’s good for your relationship and your health. Pop in a fitness DVD or stream a workout online and tone up together. Between your huffs and puffs, you can reconnect, chat about your day, and motivate each other. At the end of the workout, hit the showers—together!

7. Plan a spa night.

Get in touch with your date by having a massage night. Be sure to set the scene: Light scented candles, pick up some sensual massage oil, and play soothing music. Take turns relieving each other’s tensions.
Any date is what you make it. If you and your date can relax and have fun, the world is your playground—even if that world exists only in your living room.